Hello Sunshine

Hello sunshine and walks around the lakes! It’s officially spring. I’ve been looking forward to being outdoors in nature. Being more active in nature allowed me the opportunity to evaluate my health and health goals. Can I be real with you church? If I can’t be real with my church family then who can I be real with. Weight has been an ongoing challenge since childhood to adulthood. Everyone had an opinion on my weight from family members, teachers to complete strangers. For the first time in my life my weight and God collided and exploded into cosmic space.

My first encounter with God and my weight took placed in my early teens. My dad had our youth pastor over. I’m not sure why he was over since I was in my room but I heard my dad call my name so we could pray together. I didn’t think anything was unusual since that’s what pastors do, they pray. Unbeknownst to me my dad asked our youth pastor to pray away my FAT.  Yes, you read that correctly.  My dad asked our youth pastor to pray away my FAT. I was mortified. I could feel the shame rising from my feet to my face. I could also see how uncomfortable our youth pastor was on how to navigate this prayer knowing the sensitivity of the matter. All I could think was God get me out of here. I was way too embarrassed to even hear the prayer except Amen and dashed out of the room.

I was so upset with my dad and even more upset that he would bring God into this. I already had the weight of the world on my shoulders now God too. Yes family, I was upset with God too. I was in my early teens, insecure and overweight.  People always associated me with my weight.  My identity was my weight. I wished I knew God the way I know Him now because my identity is in Christ alone.

To my younger self and anyone out there who is struggling with body image, God loves you and He loves me. His love isn’t determined by the number on the scale or what size pants you wear. Don’t let the enemy tell you different. Delete the button on the past. Thank you, God, for another opportunity to collide once again! This time You exploded astronomically with love, grace and compassion.  Be confident in God’s Word and speak His Word over your life. I hope these scriptures will find you comfort as they did to me.

• I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful, I know that full well. (Psalm 139:14, NIV)
• “Before I formed you in the womb I knew you, before you were born I set you apart; I appointed you as a prophet to the nations.”  (Jeremiah 1:5, NIV)
• But the Lord said to Samuel, “Do not consider his appearance or his height, for I have rejected him. The Lord does not look at the things people look at. People look at the outward appearance, but the Lord looks at the heart.”  (1 Samuel 16:7, NIV)
•  Your beauty should not come from outward adornment, such as elaborate hairstyles and the wearing of gold jewelry or fine clothes. Rather, it should be that of your inner self, the unfading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is of great worth in God’s sight.  (1 Peter 3:3-4, NIV)
•  For we are God’s handiwork, created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God prepared in advance for us to do.  (Ephesians 2:10, NIV)
• For physical training is of some value, but godliness has value for all things, holding promise for both the present life and the life to come.  (1 Timothy 4:8, NIV)
• Do you not know that your bodies are temples of the Holy Spirit, who is in you, whom you have received from God? You are not your own; you were bought at a price. Therefore honor God with your bodies.  (1 Corinthians 6:19-20, NIV)